It is so important for the man/father to understand that just by being there for their wife/partner, they are helping more then they know.
They are providing a sense of calm, of continuity. Especially for a woman who decides to have a child later in life and has never been
through anything related to the word PREGNANCY until that point. Therefore, they are equally  “green” and need emotional support. The
opposite is often true in society when people make assumptions.
Assuming the WOMAN AUTOMATICALLY  knows what to do and how to feel during pregnancy and beyond. Guess what? Many don’t! They
don’t because they were busy having careers, being single and traveling. They were “being like men” as people may say, not committing or
just choosing to wait.

Regardless of the circumstances, it is important to be open minded and “open armed” when it comes to deciding to have a family or add to
an existing one. Now add to the mix, one partner who already has children. While that is topic for another article it is very common in today’
s society as well.












So many factors have to be considered, but overall and most naturally is the instinct to have wishes for your unborn child, wishes which
include providing a life with more choices then the parents may have had.  And not only more choices but the unfulfilled wish of the parent
for their child to be different then they are.  To make the right choices, healthy ones and to live their dreams while not making the same
mistakes their parent’s may have made.
While we really cannot control this outcome, when having a child we have another chance to offer a new life the opportunity to have new
thoughts, make new moves and to create their own happy life.

As Creed sings- “If I had just one wish, only one demand, I hope he’s not like me, I hope he understands!”
Guess what? He/she WILL understand! So Start talking to him/her NOW!
The New York Optimist
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“With Arms Wide Open”
By Ellie Robyns
To this day, when the rock group Creed sings, “With arms wide open,” I cry.  Why? Because
when lead singer Scott Stapp talks of raising his child with open arms and to be everything he was not, he is talking to
thousands of men.  Men who are often not given the proper respect and understanding from society. Most people just naturally
equate child rearing with women and mothers.  While the bond does start physically with the mother, the father plays an equally
critical role in the prenatal growth and later social development of the child.
Babies can hear as early as the second trimester. They can feel music, a touch of a hand. And as any pregnant woman can tell
you, when her male partner puts his loving hand on her belly and both can see the baby’s movement- there is nothing to compare
to that feeling!

In so many cases unfortunately, the opposite is true and there is no partner, not by choice but by separation or other
circumstances.  For many women who choose to have a child on their own and have the resources to do so, it is fine. However,
the bond from both parents is not to be compared to.

I am not saying anything against single parenthood or same sex parenting, I am just giving credit where it is due and often not
given. To fathers, to men who love their unborn and newborn child/children as much as the mother and wish they could do more to
connect.